Tag Archive for 'john safran vs. god'

What’s Keeping Me Awake 12.1.08

1. “Summer Heights High.” Jonah Takalua, the Tongan juve bully breaker, is ridiculous. One of the funniest characters I’ve seen in a long time. From the way Chris Lilley carries Jonah’s body to his Terets-like penchants to curse, it’s gold. I don’t care if the show’s basically a stretched-out Christopher Guest movie. The shit’s hilarious.

2. “John Safran vs. God.” Cried during the last episode. Twice. Is everybody from the South Pacific funny? Everybody I know that’s from there is. And then there’s all these shows…

3. The sonic boom that shook my house when space shuttle Endeavour made a landing at Edward’s Air Force Base on Sunday. Thought it was a bomb. So did the neighbors. After running around the block in my pajama bottoms and consulting the black suit wearing boys of Cheder Menachem, some Mexican construction workers finally told me what was up.

I asked them if they hear the boom and one guy asked “You know Columbia?” Not making the connection, I replied I did and then wondered what Columbia had to do with the bomb.

Had they read my mind and were simply explaining to my ignorant white ass that they were not Mexican, but in fact Columbian? Were there Columbian rebel groups lobbing mortar’s at La La’s Argentinean Grill from Mao’s Kitchen? Or were they just trying to sell me some blow? Turns out it was none of the above.

They were referring to the now-retired space shuttle “Columbia,” but what they meant to say was “Endeavour,” and that it was landing at Edward’s… sonic boom… blah blah blah. I thanked them, went home, and then, still shirtless, told my landlord’s wife (who, besides speaking very little English, was just pulling up at the time, and probably had no idea what I was talking about) about the space ship that had just landed, the one I thought was a bomb, and though it shook the houses, was no longer a cause for concern.

She raised a single sober eyebrow to acknowledge receipt of said message. I went back in the house with a dire urge to go explain myself, but knowing full well that it would probably do more harm than good, instead returned to the couch to finish eating the final pumpkin bar.

4. That NASA named the space shuttle “Endeavour” (”our”) rather than “Endeavor” (”or”) even though both are technically correct.

5. The prospect of alien life in any form (as usual).

6. “Slumdog Millionaire.” What a respectable “Hollywood” film can be, but almost too perfect for it’s own good. With all the flashbacks the pacing was a little jacked though. Mr. Boyle, should’ve trimmed 15 off or just killed of the many flashback sequences to keep it moving. There was so much back and forth, though intrigued, I felt like I wasn’t really given a chance to care about the protagonist when it came to his present “Millionaire” dilemma as Boyle was too busy wowing me with his “Slumdog” past.

6. Medicinal Marijuana. I don’t smoke you enough, but when I do it’s all brand new again. Thank you for the munchies, the ears and the tears.

7. The fog. Send more please. Everybody looks mysterious when they walk through it. Even in L.A. Makes me want to know you more.

8. The fact that I missed M83 Saturday. Please tell me they sucked so I can get over it.

9. That there’s an “actual” market for “virtual” merchandise, and that the very existence of the market is based on the fact that there are enough cheaters to support it.

10. “Cape Canaveral” by Conor Oberst and the Mystic Valley Band

11. And the fact that I still don’t own a smart phone, yet Twitter anyway.